Why We Don't Do Things

Why is it that we don't do what we want to do?

I'm talking about doing those things we've always wanted to do or try...like traveling in Europe or skydiving. Maybe you want to apologize to a friend or approach a cute girl/guy in the coffeeshop.

“Well, I just can't afford to save any money for vacation right now. Maybe later”

“Yeah I'd love to skydive but I'm not sure how it works or where I can go. Plus I really want to go with a friend. I'm too busy right now but maybe later”

“I'd totally approach that girl but I'm not wearing my best clothes, plus she probably has a boyfriend. Next time I see her I will.”

There are a myriad of excuses we could come up with as to why we aren't doing what we really want to do. And it makes sense doesn't it? Life these days is busy, oh so busy. In order to support ourselves financially, we have to work forty hours a week and commute for countless hours. Don't forget we still have to exercise and have fun and let loose every once in a while. Oh and don't forget families, we have to have family time.

And these are all valid excuses. You do need family time. You do need to enjoy yourselves and let loose. At your current spending level and income, a vacation is not possible. She very well could have a boyfriend.

But if you have lived on this earth for at least 18 years you should know by now that life is very short and very precious. How fast have the last year gone by? The last five? The last twenty five? In a blink.

So if it is possible to take a vacation to some exotic location, why not make the necessary sacrifices? Yeah that girl could have a boyfriend but why not make a decision to swallow the fear and uncertainty and go say hi. It could be the start to something great.

I hate the whole “Life is short/Carpe Diem” type of quotes because they have become a cheesy quote to flip out there in motivational speeches. But when you really think deeply about what they mean, it can change your perspective on things. It's not so much a cheesy quote as much it is a reminder to always be aligning yourself to what you are doing.

I try to always ask myself “Is what I am doing right now moving me closer to where I want to go and who I want to be?” Sometimes the answer is yes. Sometimes, it's no. And sometimes it's not applicable. But it brings clarity and through clarity you can gain focus and energy.

The point is to always be asking yourself some sort of question that realigns you with whatever purpose or goals or principles you have. If you aren't doing what you want to be doing, change what you're doing.

Don't listen to those little people who will tell you that you need to force yourself to be happy, that it's your own fault you're miserable. Sometimes you do need to adjust your attitude, sometimes you just need to change your situation. Only you will know.

And sometimes you'll be wrong, but you'll learn from it. And you'll learn that it's not a big deal.

You see, life is this malleable thing. You can shape it into whatever you want. And ultimately you decide what to mold it into. You make decisions about who and what you let in to your consciousness... which in turn, effects your paradigm of what life is meant to be.

You let negativity in, it will affect how you see the world. You let positivity in, it will affect how you see the world. Neither are a right or wrong but it is a choice every second of every day. Even when you aren't making a choice you are making a choice. If you are sitting in front of a television, you are a passive passenger but you decided to sit there in the first place.

So if you're always the decider making decisions (like dubya), then all those things you want to do are ultimately up to you, not to someone else or circumstance. You are no longer a victim, no longer can you play the blame game. You lose much of the power to blame, but gain strength through yourself, realizing that you can in fact do whatever you'd like.

So if you really want to go to South Africa, figure out a plan to get you on that path. It may seem like a daunting task but I'm confident you'll learn some wisdom about life that you can share with others. I'm sure of it.