Yes, the growth of an adolescent to adult is an amazing thing. Same with the building of a skyscraper.
However, the type of growth I'm talking about isn't physical. It's usually only observable. It can't always be measured.
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| That's definitely growth right there. |
Like when someone get's their finances in order. Or decides to quit smoking. Or makes an effort to stop avoiding confrontation. Or tries to be more social. Or attempts to meditate consistently. Or wants to make more money through a side job.
That's the kind of personal growth that rocks.
Like everything though, there is a dark side. It usually rears itself through unhappiness and ambition.
I would never ever consider working hard towards a goal to be a bad thing, but there are very many ambitious people who I don't want to aspire to be.
The difference is at the most basic level. Are you trying to get your finances in order so that other people will finally respect you? Are you doing it so that you can allow yourself to feel good at the end of it all?
Or are you doing it because it's a challenge? Because you feel like learning something new is fun? Maybe you just want to try something different.
These two approaches are completely opposed to one another.
One comes from a state of trying to “add something”. It is saying that you feel incomplete. Once you reach the goal you will find that elusive completeness.
The other approach says you feel good but are interested in challenging yourself for the sake of challenging yourself. If you feel like it will be a great opportunity to learn about yourself, about what gets you going and what makes you ticks, then you are probably coming from a better place.
Chances are good that you are coming from a place that is in between.
You feel that going after XYZ goal will add a dimension of peace or happiness to your life (that isn't there) but also are excited at a new challenge. It is rarely 100% one way or the other.
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| Yes, this picture has nothing to do with this post. Or does it? |
Besides, coming from a place of incompleteness can lead you to that second place. Becoming a workaholic to make more money (which is perceived as more happiness) can lead a person to burn out. Burning out can lead you to see that life is short and that it's not worth it to give your life to your job. From there, motivations change and you can strive after what makes you happy and energized.
So in the end improving yourself in any way shape or form is a good thing. It doesn't matter what it is or where you're coming from or if you're doing it for all the wrong reasons.
Those are all just excuses for inaction anyway.
