Live at the Edge

I’ve heard that if you think you have problems that you should find somebody with bigger ones.


Well I think this applies to having goals; if you think yours are big (or difficult or not realistic) then find somebody with bigger or more difficult goals.

I used to think I had it hard.  I was working 30 hours a week and had a busy ass life outside of my job.  I meditated, read, worked out and ate healthy nearly every day.  I felt like I was always on the go.

I felt like I never had enough time to work on things like my little side business I was trying to cultivate.  I was too busy with all my other commitments.


But really I could never focus my brain enough to put all my attention on it.  Really, the burning motivation was missing.


Well I traded my 30/hour job for a 50+ one and am beginning to see that the best way to kick yourself in the ass, to light a proverbial fire under it, is to challenge the fuck out of yourself.


Oh you can’t get X,Y and Z done only working 30 hours a week?  Trying working 50 hours and keeping all those old commitments.


You’ll figure it out.  I did somehow.


There are definitely growing pains and a lot of extended periods of discomfort but like a muscle tearing down under the duress of a weighted dumbbell, it only makes a person stronger.


So, the question is, was I being lazy before?


I’d say no.  I was sticking to a lot of different commitments to a certain degree.  However, it’s clear that I was far from maximizing my potential.


And the only thing that was going to push me to the limit was a new challenge that was outside my comfort zone.  Working fifty hours every week is fucking tough.  Mad respect to everybody who runs that grind.


They say if you really want to be a badass motherfucker that you have to live at the edge of your comfort zone.


Not living at the edge means complacency.  Sure, you know the ins and outs of your job or relationship or whatever, but your soul is slowly being sucked out of you.


Your brain relaxes because it can, because you can be comfortable and it has most of its needs met.

And like a muscle that doesn’t get used, your work ethic, your focus, your drive, it all atrophies to the point where you suddenly can’t seem to follow through on any commitments with yourself.


Living on the edge on the other hand, it keeps you mentally sharp.  It’s usually somewhat scary so it keeps you at attention.  Your brain has to use more energy to function because it has to navigate through uncharted territory.


I remember this most vividly living in France and learning the language.  Because I wanted to learn the language so badly I would listen to anything, every conversation, every word, just so that I could move a little bit closer to understanding .00001% more than did the previous day.  My brain felt fried at the end of every day because I was cramming it full of so much.  It was an exhilarating feeling.


In the natural world, there is no such thing as the idea of “staying the same”.  Everything is either growing or dying.  And so is true with the development of ourselves.


You can make the choice to continue to challenge yourself and play as close to the edge of your comfort as possible.  If you choose to live in the world of comfort and complacency, then you make the choice to atrophy something.

But it is always a choice.  And if you don’t make the choice, the choice will be made for you.